CFB Week 1 “Previews”

Posted: August 30, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: CFB Weekly Picks, MB 2013 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment »

As we have already established, a favorite MegaBracket pastime is to “preview” upcoming events with a plethora of random information. The college football season is no different as the sheer number of games played each week allows us to pick games at random and learn a little more about the colleges, players, coaches, and towns involved. Several different MB members contribute throughout the season with previews of their own. Each week’s collation will be published in one easy-to-find post.

[Ed. Note: If you would like to add your own contribution, simply e-mail it in and we will include it in the appropriate week’s previews.]

Furman @ Samford – Saturday, September 1 @ 3:30 pm CDT

Author: Ryan

In celebration of the start of the greatest time of year, and to honor the new President of my association, the head golf coach at Furman, I give you my first preview of the year, Furman at Samford, The I Don’t Remember Why We Are Picking This But I Am Glad We Are Game Of The Week.

We are going to do these “Tale of the Tape Style” this year, but without columns because that seems hard.

Mascots

Furman – Paladins.  This technically means a paragon of chivalry, a heroic champion, or any of the 12 peers of French emperor Charlemagne’s court.  Their actual mascot is a knight on a horse named Sir Paladin, and he rides Fury.  He is all kinds of awesome and looks like he could kick the crap out of Traveler at USC.  The Paladin name was first used by a sports writer in the 30s to describe the basketball team, and stuck for them, but did not become the official nickname of all teams until 1961.

Samford – Bulldogs.  This technically means slobbery dog that makes Jimmy noises all day long.  Their mascot is a costumed bulldog (real bulldogs are hard to come by) named Spike.  Samford used to be called Howard College, and I assume they were Bulldogs back then, but I have no idea.

Advantage – Paladins.  Always Paladins.  (Side note – I was 100% convinced a Paladin was a bird before today).

Coaching Staff (Most Awesome Member)

Furman – Cornerback/Special Teams Coordinator Antonio Goss.  A former 49er and Ram, Goss was a back-up linebacker for 2 49ers (one Joe Montana-led and one Steve Young-led)  Super Bowl teams and was the Special Teams Captain at the XXIX game.

[Ed. Note: Goss beat out Furman’s Kickers & Punters coach out for this award even through Bob Price is the happiest old guy ever. Either happy or pooping.]

Samford – A little bit more NFL playing and coaching experience to choose from here, but the obvious choice is Head Coach Pat Sullivan, the 1971 Heisman Trophy winner at Auburn.

Advantage – Heisman always beats Special Teams Captain.

Best Player Names

Furman – Tie – Dakota Derrick (Back-up QB) and Dakota Dozier (All-Conference OT).  With any luck these two have their very own cable access western.

Samford – Tie – Trett Hardman (Back-up QB turned TE) and Armando Bonheur (F OL).  The best Buddy Cop/Porno flick ever made.  Hey Armando, what did you say you wanted to do to my sister? http://samfordsports.com/roster.aspx?rp_id=3496&path=football

Advantage – Hardman & Bonheur.  This wasn’t even a fair fight after that photo.

Locations

Furman – Greenville, SC (long known as The Textile Capital of the World). It could be named for Revolutionary General Nathanael Greene, or Isaac Green.  Apparently they don’t know.  The Lynyrd Skynrd plane crash took off from Greenville after a show there, before running out of fuel in Mississippi.  Greenville’s most famous residents include Kevin Garnett, Lucas Glover, Shoeless Joe Jackson, and Jesse Jackson.

Samford – Homewood, AL (a suburb of Birmingham).  It has one of the highest population densities in Alabama.  The Homewood High band has played in the Tournament of Roses parade more than any other band in the state of Alabama.  Children’s Author and Poet Charles Ghigna lives there.

Advantage – Furman.  Greenville seems to have a lot on Homewood.

Notable Alumni

Furman –Thomas T. Goldstein, Jr., a Physicist, but one that invented the first video game; Jimmy’s favorite singer Amy Grant; Herman Lay, the founder of Lay’s (which became Frito-Lay); US Soccer player Clint Dempsey; QB Ingle Martin; Sam Wyche; Golfers Brad Faxon and Bruce Fleisher; and Chick Golfers Dottie Pepper, Beth Daniel and Betsy King.

Samford – Coaches Bobby Bowden and Jimbo Fisher; NFLer Cortland Finnegan; and Actor Tony Hale (Buster on Arrested Development).

Advantage – Furman is responsible for Video Games and Doritos.  I don’t think anything could top that with our group.

Decision

Furman takes this one 3-2, which will surely lead the Paladins to victory.

 

Sioux Falls @ St. Cloud State – Thursday, August 30 @ 6:00 pm CDT

Author: Bristol

Why not steal Ryan’s idea and do the other weekly previews the same way…

Mascots

Sioux Falls – Cougars. Way to be original – no one else ever would have thought to use Cougars as their mascot. However, bonus points for this behind the scenes video on what it takes to be Cooper the Cougar.

St. Cloud State – Huskies. And I thought USF was unoriginal. But, Blizzard the Husky looks like this and has a Facebook page and a Twitter account. (Also, how about the blatant rip-off of the Montreal Canadiens logo by St. Cloud State?)

Advantage – Blizzard the Husky – Facebook, Twitter and Blizzard molesting college chicks in hockey sweaters beat a two-minute clip on some random local TV station.

Coaching Staff (Most Awesome Member)

Sioux Falls – A tie between Coach Tiny (their name, not mine) and Ryan Grubb. Grubb played football at good ol’ BVU (Buena Vista University, my alma mater) while I matriculated in beautiful Storm Lake, IA. He was a four-year starter and team captain at BV before coaching at Kingsley-Pierson High School and South Dakota State. Coach Tiny is Coach Tiny and that’s all he needs.

St. Cloud State – Steve Grimit. All. The. Jowls. Grimit played football and wrestled at Western Illinois (or we like to call it, Willinois) and qualified for the Division I Wrestling National Championship and was a football c0-captain.

(Honorable Mention: Head Coach Scott Underwood. Underwood is from Marion, IA, played at Augustana College in Sioux Falls and has had coaching stops at Augustana, the University of Sioux Falls, and the University of North Dakota. Alas, he has so few jowls…)

Advantage – Sioux Falls. Are you kidding? No one beats Coach Tiny. No one.

Best Player Names

Sioux Falls – Bo Bearshield. Best Hair – Evan Colfack.

St. Cloud State – Tie – Viliamu Sioka Latu & Shaquille Theus. Best Hair – Bo Putrah.

Advantage – Sioux Falls. Shaquille Theus would win if this were basketball but how do you defeat a Bearshield?

Locations

Sioux Falls – Sioux Falls, SD – “The Best Little City in America” and the hometown of a certain co-writer of the weekly football previews. The John Morrell meat packing plant celebrated its 100th anniversary in 2009. Notable residents and natives include actress January Jones; entertainment reporters Pat O’Brien and Mary Hart; World War II fighter pilot Joe Foss; NFL coach Mike Martz; and actor David Soul (Hutch from Starsky & Hutch).

St. Cloud State – St. Cloud, MN – “The Granite City” was named after a city of the same name in France (strike one). It’s first mayor was a slaveowner in the free state of Minnesota and many southerners moved to St. Cloud with their slaves after the Dred Scott decision was declared unconstitutional in 1857 (strike two). Courtroom scenes from The Mighty Ducks were filmed in St. Cloud (one strike removed). Notable natives and residents include former MLB player Jim Eisenreich, and two Jeopardy champions.

Advantage – Sioux Falls. If being the hometown of an original MB member (and Pat O’Brien) isn’t enough, Sioux Falls squares off against the northern slave capital of the United States.

Notable Alumni

Sioux Falls – None listed anywhere that I could find.

Update: (from MB member and Sioux Falls native Ryan)

The only notable USF Alumni is the Head Coach of the most dominant force in MegaBracket Indoor Football, the Sioux Falls Storm.
  • He has led the Storm to a record of 140-28 in ten seasons.
  • 6 Titles.
  • Record 40-game winning streak (they say the longest professional winning streak).
  • 3 undefeated seasons.
  • Before taking the Storm job he was the QB coach at USF for five years.  In that time the were 67-3 and won three NAIA titles.
  • As a QB at USF he led the Cougars to a title in 1997 and was an All-American.
  • He also teaches at my old high school now – apparently highly successful independent indoor football coaching doesn’t pay the bills.

St. Cloud State – Actor John Hawkes (one of the great “That Guys”); Jodi Huisentruit, a local TV news anchor who went missing in Mason City, IA in 1995 – if you are from where and when I was from, this was a HUGE story. She has never been found; professional wrestler Lars Anderson; Minnesota Twins TV play-by-play announcer Dick Bremer; and Richard Dean Anderson. That’s right – fucking MacGyver went to St. Cloud State.

Advantage – In the biggest rout ever on any planet in any contest, St. Cloud State.

Update: USF at least has a notable alumnus now, but unless Jesus went there, they aren’t beating MacGyver. And probably not even then.

Decision

Sioux Falls takes this one 3-2, but if it had been any other town, MacGyver would have propelled St. Cloud State to the win regardless of the score.

 

Chadron State @ Montana State – Thursday, August 30 @ 8:05 pm CDT

Author: Bristol

Mascots

Chadron State – Eagles. Portrait and action photos of Elmo Eagle.

Montana State – Bobcats. Champ the Bobcat likes to flex and point.

Advantage – Chadron State. Let’s see – generic mascot? Check and check. Wearing a football uniform? Check and check. Pictures doing mascot-y things? Check and check. Alliteration? Check and no check. Elmo Eagle wins by a letter.

Coaching Staff (Most Awesome Member)

Chadron State – Craig Jerslid. “Coach Jersey” has coached at some awesome schools – South Dakota Tech, Butler Community College, Northwest Mississippi College, and Hutchinson Community College. He was a starting defensive back at Colorado State, including their 9-4 season in 1990 which ended in the Freedom Bowl. (You know why America sucks now? No Freedom Bowl.)

Montana State – Demo Odems. Odems was a four-year letterwinner at WR for the University of Iowa. He played for the Texas Terminators and Grand Rapids Rampage in the Arena Football League and was named Ironman of the Game in Arena Bowl XV in 2001. He as coaching stops at Lancaster HS in Lancaster, TX, Lyndon B. Johnson HS in Austin, TX, Arkansas-Monticello and Wisconsin.

Advantage – Montana State. A guy who played in one Freedom Bowl or a guy who played for Freedom University? No contest.

Best Player Names

Chadron State – Tie – Frantzlee LaCrete and KamRon Tomlinson. Happiest Guy – Josh Borm. Best Hair is difficult – I’m going with Robert Jackson first, Clay Cundall second and Tyler Wright third.

Montana State – Tie – Orenzo Davis and twin brothers Kazz and Kruiz Siewing. Most Republican-like Hair – the aptly named Luke Halliburton. (I don’t make this stuff up folks, I just report it.)

Advantage – Chadron State – High-top fade always defeats Republican hair.

Location

Chadron State – Chadron, NE – the county seat of Dawes County sits near the Museum of the Fur Trade. Notable residents include actor Justin Bruening, the lead role in the failed new Knight Rider series in 2008; and Leslie Lynch King, Sr., the biological father of Gerald Ford.

Montana State – Bozeman, MT – the county seat of Gallatin County is the 4th-largest city in Montana. The area around Bozeman was once known as the Sweet Pea capital of the nation and held a Sweet Pea Carnival from 1906 to 1916. The movie A River Runs Through It was filmed in and around the city. Notable people include two-time Academy Award-winning actor Gary Cooper; musician John Mayer; actress Daniella Deutscher (Julie Connor from Hang Time); and entreprenuer/rich guy Ted Turner.

Advantage – Montana State. Hang Time > new Knight Rider. I mean, it’s not like we’re talking about The Hoff here.

Notable Alumni

Chadron State – former NFL wide receiver Don Beebe; current NFL running back Danny Woodhead; former Golden State Warriors GM Larry Riley; and William David Sanders, a teacher killed in the Columbine school massacre.

Montana State – former NFL and college head coach Dennis Erickson; TV sportscaster Craig Kilborn; Pro Football Hall of Fame kicker Jan Stenerud; 1996 Olympic silver medalist in the hammer throw, Lance Deal; and former Purdue head coach Joe Tiller.

Advantage – Montana State. Don Beebe vs. Jan Stenerud is close but Joe Tiller seals the deal.

Decision

Montana State claims a 3-2 come-from-behind on the strength of Hang Time and Joe Tiller’s mustache.

 

Oklahoma Panhandle State @ Missouri Science & Technology – Saturday, Septmber 1 @ 6:30 pm CDT

Author: Bristol

Mascots

Panhandle State – Aggies. I can’t find anything about an actual mascot but OPSU does have the Firestone Meat Laboratory.

Missouri S&T – Miners. Joe Miner to be specific. Please use the Joe Miner graphic correctly. Not sure how – here are some tips. He carries a pick ax and a slide rule and terrifies your children.

Advantage – Missouri S&T. Joe Miner has his own meat laboratory and it’s much more frightening than OPSU’s.

Coaching Staff (Most Awesome Member)

Panhandle State – Devin McDonald. Coach McDonald played this spring for the Louisiana Swashbucklers of the Professional Indoor Football League (in MB, of course). He played collegiately at Navarro College and Angelo State before spending last season as a student assistant at Angelo State.

Missouri S&T – Tie – Gerold Rodriguez and Luke Rayfield. Rodriguez was a wide receiver and kick returner at Arizona and UNLV and is the cousin of former NFL player J.P. Losman. Rayfield has an amazing shaved head/beard with no mustache combination happening.

Advantage – Panhandle State. Rayfield’s look had a slight advantage over the Louisiana Swashbucklers, but Rodriguez being related to J.P. Losman lost it for Missouri S&T.

Best Player Names

Panhandle State – Tie – Neptune Joseph and Jihad’ Wright. Best Hair/Most Awesome – Allston Hadley (3rd from the top on the left side.

Missouri S&T – Smook Thomas. Best Hair – tie between Jack Miller and Logan Turk.

Advantage – Pandhandle State. One player named Neptune and another as big as Jupiter beat out Smook and that one guy from Two-A-Days.

Location

Panhandle State – Goodwell, OK – a town of 1,293 way out in the panhandle of Oklahoma. Was named Goodwell because a good well was found there. Nice work, everyone. Goodwell is the home of the No Man’s Land Museum which has been preserving the Oklahoma Panhandle’s heritage since 1934.

Missouri S&T – Rolla, MO – the county seat of Phelps county and home of the headquarters of the Mark Twain National Forest, the only United States National Forest in Missouri. The town was named when new settlers from North Carolina voted to name it after Raleigh, NC, but they chose to spell it as if they had lived in Missouri all their lives. Notable people from Rolla include Civil War Union General Samuel Curtis and Olympic gymnastics gold medalist Shannon Miller.

Advantage – Missouri S&T. I’ve been through Rolla many times and I never thought I would says this, but Rolla wins easily.

Notable Alumni

Panhandle State – NAIA All-American running back Jim Holder, the only Aggie in the College Football Hall of Fame; and former NFL safety Earl Eubanks.

Missouri S&T – 2004 World Series of Poker champion Greg “Fossilman” Raymer; Jack Dorsey, the creator of Twitter; and astronauts Thomas Akers, Janet Kavandi and Sandra Magnus.

Advantage – Missouri S&T. 3 astronauts and the guy who created Twitter seem a little more impressive than two football players no one outside the panhandle have ever heard of.

Decision

On the strength of Joe Miner’s creepiness, Twitter and how depressing Goodwell, OK seems, Missouri S&T ekes out a 3-2 victory.

 

Camel Foe – Week 1, Shorter University

Posted: August 30, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: Camel Foe, MB 2013 | Tags: , | Leave a comment »

Our critically acclaimed (meaning, enjoyed by at least 2 of the original 8 MB members) series Camel Foe returns for its second season in MB 2013. Each week we shine the MB flashlight on the upcoming opponent of our beloved Campbell University Fighting Camels. We mix together some actual football information with our usual mix of random facts to concoct a delicious appetizer for the week’s college football smorgasbord. Without further ado, let’s learn a little about the Camels’ season-opening opponent, Shorter University.

Shorter University

Location: Rome, Georgia (population: 36,303 as of 2010 census)

Established: 1873 as the Cherokee Baptist Female College

Motto: Light, Truth

Enrollment: 3,500

Nickname: Hawks

Affiliation: Currently transitioning from the NAIA and the Southern States Athletic Conference to NCAA Division II and the Gulf South Conference. This school year is Gulf Coast’s first as a full member of Division II although it will remain ineligible for NCAA championships for the next 2 seasons.

Random Fact #1: During the 1920s, the college constructed the first indoor swimming pool in the United States.

Random Fact #2: The college became co-educational in the 1950s and also began sports programs in the NAIA during that decade.

Random Fact #3: As of October 2011, the university requires all employees to sign and adhere to a “Personal Lifestyle Statement” that includes the following principles:

  • They will be loyal to the mission of Shorter University as a Christ-centered institution affiliated with the Georgia Baptist Convention
  • They will not engage in the use, sale, possession, or production of illegal drugs
  • They will reject as acceptable all sexual activity not in agreement with the Bible, including, but not limited to, premarital sex, adultery, and homosexuality
  • They will not use alcoholic beverages in the presence of students, and will abstain from serving, from using, and from advocating the use of alcoholic beverages in public (e.g. in locations that are open to use by the general public, including as some examples restaurants, concert venues, stadiums, and sports facilities) and in settings in which students are present or are likely to be present. Neither would they promote or encourage the use of alcohol
  • They will actively engage in a local church

Random Fact #4: Due to clause #4, it is unlikely any of the executive members of MB will ever apply for a job at Shorter University

Notable Persons:

  • NCAA basketball coach Bill Foster, one of 16 coaches to win at least 500 games
  • Benton Gill, lead singer of the band Crisis

Well, that was impressive. Let’s throw in notables from the city of Rome as well.

  • Professional wrestler Arn Anderson (that’s more like it)
  • NFL running back Ronnie Brown
  • Former NFL running back Larry Kinnebrew
  • Florida head football coach Will Muschamp
  • Former NFL player and coach Dan Reeves
  • Ellen Wilson, First Lady of the United States (first wife of Woodrow Wilson)
  • George Stephen Morrison, Rear Admiral in the United States Navy and father of singer Jim Morrison; Admiral Morrison was part of the crew of the minelayer Pruitt stationed in Hawaii and witnessed the attack on Pearl Harbor from that vessel

Oh yeah, the Football Team:

  • In 2011, Shorter finished 6-4 overall and 3-3 in the Southern States Athletic Conference, its 7th final season in that conference and in NAIA after starting football in 2005
  • Shorter played just 4 home games in 2011, splitting those contest while finishing 4-2 on the road
  • Shorter runs an offense similar to Air Force, putting an emphasis on the QB and FB positions – they ran the ball 486 times in 10 games last season, while throwing it just 89
  • The Hawks lost their top 2 QBs and top 3 FBs from 2011
  • The leading returning rusher is slotback Roderick Jones who ran for 400 yards on just 34 carries, a ridiculous 11.8 per carry
  • The team’s leading receiver last year had 7 catches for 161 yards and 3 TDs. For the season. He also graduated meaning someone will have to step up and replace those 0.7 catches per game in the offense
  • Shorter returns 5 players on defense who garnered all-conference accolades in 2011, including NAIA All-American ILB Demery Hawkins
  • Best Name Nominees:
    • Jovann Shabazz, SaDarrius Rooks, K-Sun Manzano, Terrian Beavers, Quay Boddie, Marktavious Dasher, Santavious Bryant, Maurice Bloodser
    • The winner – K-Sun Manzano (I’m not telling him he didn’t win)

Prediction:

This is an interesting match-up as a team new to Division II (and in just its 8th season) takes on a non-scholarship FCS program in just its 5th year. We may learn a little as to whether you get better players in NAIA or D-II with partial scholarships rather than at an FCS school with no scholarships. On the field, we will see a match-up of strengths as the experienced and talented Shorter defense takes on second-year starting QB Braden Smith and the Camels offense. On the flip side, the Camel defense and Hawk offense each return only a few starters and match up schemes that are not widely in vogue – the option offense of Shorter vs. the 3-3-5 defense of Campbell. The key to this game will likely be how well the inexperienced Shorter offense runs the option and how well the inexperienced Camel defense can defend it. Expect a fast game as both teams prefer to run the ball, with Shorter especially using the pass as an afterthought.  The x-factor in this game is that Shorter will have to deal with the excitement surrounding the first night game ever played at Barker-Lane Stadium. I don’t think you can prepare yourself in practice for the atmosphere in Buies Creek on a Thursday night. The rabid Camel fans help propel the team to a 1-0 start on the season – Campbell 27, Shorter 21.